This is My Confidence
The past several days Josh and I have been experiencing a lot of warfare. As my social worker spoke to me this week, a lot of shifting takes place in the final weeks leading up to adoption. Another dear friend reminded me that Satan hates adoption and to not stop fighting just because you see roadblocks.
We are still here in Florida in the 11th hour, twins delivery nearly here and we received news that it is possible that it could fall apart. Adoption is not natural, there is nothing normal about a mother needing to place her children. There are so many hearts at stake and there is a lot of pain here for all involved. There is also a lot of deceit and evil trying to rob those involved, including us and our precious daughter Harmony Kate. Our hearts ache for the twins to be Flayharts and for Harmony Kate to grow up with her brother and sister. We are praying boldly that God would keep all three children together in the days ahead and we plead with you to join us in prayer.
One of the most powerful ways I connect with the Father is through music. Prior to and since these recent shifting of events, I have one song that has been my anthem and reflects where we have been and where we are right now. It’s called “Do it again” by Elevation Worship. Here are the lyrics that have really resonated with my heart:
I’ve seen You move, You move the mountains. And I believe- I’ll see You do it again. You made a way where there was no way and I believe I’ll see You do it again. Your promise still stands great is Your faithfulness.. Your faithfulness. I’m still in Your hands. This is my confidence... You’ve never failed me yet and I never will forget.
It’s interesting now that I like this song. I remember it striking a nerve so deep when I read the line “you’ve never failed me yet.” In my bitterness and unbelief, I thought God had failed me and that He was silent to my cries for a child. I’ve always known and community has so often reminded me that hindsight is everything. That I would look back on those days of sorrow and pain, and see His hand and faithfulness. I look back and with such joy and confidence I see that God not only did not fail me but He has done above what I have asked for. He has taken me to such richer places in my walk with Him and with others. He has also given us Harmony Kate and my love for her and gratitude for her is above what I could have dreamed. And to top that off I just feel God’s delight and smile as we continue to get to know her and settle in to family life.
So the chord, “and I never will forget...You’ve never failed me yet” is a great comfort to my heart as we face uncertainty in the days ahead. Josh and I have been amazed by the confidence we sense in God’s rule over this whole situation. We know what we are boldly praying for is in line with His heart to protect the least of the these and the orphan. Our motives are pure and our hearts are surrendering to His will. That doesn’t mean that we will get the twins, but it does mean God will not change..He will remain faithful. He made a way where there was no way by giving us our daughter. We had no hope for having our own child and God has blessed us abundantly. The financial obstacles were too high for us but not too high for God and we have seen Him show off His mighty power and fight for us. Please fight with us and pray for all hearts involved. For eyes to be open to the truth, comfort in the midst of great pain, and the protection and welfare of these children.